Why the 4 year warranty system is good with Dell

My computer is practically radiating perfection right now. It is sparkling clean, outside AND inside. It responds to the slightest nuances in the pressures of my fingertips, displays each letter I type with gold trim, and navigates from page to page at the speed of light. Hell, I don't even NEED to type web adresses into browsers or click onto programs to open them anymore since my computer functions solely by reading the brainwaves that I send to it because it is just THAT AMAZING NOW. Is that a computer or is that the latest model of an electron particle accelerator? I can't tell the difference because the likeness is so convincing!

You might have guessed by now that I just spent 2 hours, 10 minutes, and 51 seconds with a Dell representative on the phone. That probably makes it the longest conversation I've ever had on the phone in one complete run, even taking into account that one time I called that one person to start to read the dictionary out loud to him. That, by the way, never happened, but don't put it past me.

The whole process was relatively painless. This could be because I'm the not the excitable type and golly, if my computer crashes and the hard drive is down, well then, I guess my computer crashed, I lost all the information in it, and I guess I have to replace the hard drive. Which is what the situation looked like for a few minutes at the beginning, during which I felt like I was watching a little kid throwing a tantrum and breaking all sorts of really expensive statues and thinking "Well, I guess I'll just have to superglue them back together again." So what WOULD make me act like a possessed, frantic beast?

1. Missing a final I actually did study for.
2. Watching a very bad episode of Roswell. All I'm going to say is that the first episode of season three SUCKED and it had better redeem itself somehow before I lose interest in the entire show completely.
3. Something else

Julie is probably on her 5th balloon animal now, since she's popped the 4 before it. Finally. She finished a bunny. Is she losing her touch? Perhaps she should have consulted my computer for some help (since I'm giving her unlimited warranty) because my computer is just the all-powerful, omniscient master of this entire room.