Some people just didn't pray hard enough this Sunday

Some people may fondly remember the rather recent entry about Tix's car, Toots. The masking tape, the looming holes, the loose sprigs, and busted wires all served in endearing to you this monster of a car, much like your favorite shredded teddy bear. Its innards might be all over your bed when you wake up in the morning after a night of intensely clutching it to your heart, but as long as the general shape is recognizable, it's still your baby.

Well...

WELL...

Toots has tooted its last.















Sunday afternoon after Tix was cruising home from work, he rammed into the veritable Chariot of the Lord and was assailed by the wrath of God. A bus full of enthused Baptists blasted their way directly into Tix's path, and Tix's guardian angel was not around to help out. Between discussing police reports and insurance information a short while afterwards, the bus driver attempted to convert Tix. To set him on the right path once again.

What follows is Toots's (pictoral) and verbal eulogy






























The World after Toots's final bleat

With the passing of your grand old frame
The world can never again be the same.
The birds and the bees
Even the grand old trees
All seem to sigh "Oh dear" discontentedly.

It is true you might not have been magnificently attired
Some say your registration was even expired,
But through all this
It was unadultered bliss
Driving in you along 55th's cemented abyss.

We know you're in a better place
With dogs, angels, and an everlasting grace,
We miss you, really, we do,
That heart so big and true,
So put in a good word for us, won't you?















RIP Toots. You're flying now.

Starting yesterday with Mary Kate pouring ice cold water all over me and my poor unsuspecting computer, I have been shot with water several times. It's that time of year again: assassins. Asassins? Assasins? Whatever it is, it's making me feel like and ass (HAAAAAAA) and I'm not even playing. This last time was when I was getting out of the elevator and I felt a short, powerful buzz right behind my ear. As I was wiping off the Michigan Lake tap water sprayed all over my face, I couldn't help but wonder when someone was going to get to the point and just use a real gun.

I have done laundry a week ago, and my clean clothes are STILL in my hamper. This means my dirty clothes are strewn everywhere across the room. No one is doing their dishes (still), and the recylcing pile is once again growing to an inordinate size.

PLEASE! PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERABLE LITTLE EXISTENCE!

Not really.