What does everyone have against bright colors?

I'm in California now, desperately trying to zip up the dress I'm planning on wearing to Kim's wedding. It goes up half the time, the other half the time it doesn't. I just need it to work ONCE. That's all I need.

Anyway, the flight over from Chicago was pretty unremarkable. For the second leg of my journey I managed to get a full row of seats to myself, which I never use anyway, but it was still there for my convenience. The same music videos were repeated at least 80 times and I listened to the songs once each. On one of them, there was a group of people dancing energetically to what then turned out to be some elevator music type deal. What a let down. Just looking at it, it was almost like a preview to the dancing that will go on in El Cantante.

The amusing part of the journey came when we landed in California. European style, this airplane landed far from the terminal and long, connected buses had to come to take us to our loving families waiting with open arms. What broke out on the airplane with this news was a Stage 5 Panic Alert. The flight attendants were there to direct us with "There will be TWO BUSES. Half the plane will get on ONE BUS, the other half will get on the SECOND BUS. Do not worry if you get on the SECOND BUS. You will be going to the SAME PLACE."

Once we made it on to the bus, there were people there saying "HOLD ON TO THE RAILS. THIS BUS WILL BE MOVING."

It's as if they were saying:

"People, this is what is called public transportation. They use it in places like the Amazon and England. I know, this seems a little snug, your son's soccer team might not be able to fit into this, it definitely wouldn't fit all your groceries, and there is no TV, but it has an amazing turning radius. We will try to make this as painless as possible. We will get through this together."